December 12, 2022

The Christmas Heat

The $221.85 should be spent on Christmas presents. Or porn. Or booze. Or porn and booze for Christmas presents.

But instead, McKayla C. spends that money on a furnace inspection.

A nice young man with long hair rings her doorbell and she leads him into the basement and they make small talk about the weather, football, and their shared disappointment about how, 28 years later, there has still never been a sequel to Forrest Gump.

They become fast compadres, in a way, McKayla C. and the young man who inspects her furnace, changes her filter, and tells her she’ll be warm all winter long. Long past Christmas.

McKayla slaps the youn man when he says this believing he is being fresh. He asks her then if she wasn’t indeed the one who actually thought the $221.85 should have been spent on pornography and she says yes, yes, it was her. It sure was.

McKayla C. then looks in the mirror and takes off her baseball cap and tool belt and apologizes and then also admits that there is no furnace repairman. It is just her.

But damn, if that furnace ain’t hot tonight. --TK