December 9, 2022

Christmas Rivalries

All Jesus’ older brother, Hank, wants for Christmas is a catcher’s mitt.

Instead, he got a baby brother.

“And your brother could be the savior of humankind,” his mother Mary tells Hank.

“Truly,” his father Joseph adds.

“Sure,” Hank says while wondering if Carlton Fisk, Johnny Bench, or Roy Campanella ever got a baby brother for Christmas.

“Will I get a catcher’s mitt next Christmas?” Hank asks.

“Probably not!” Joseph says and pats his son on the head.

Hank cries himself to sleep. The next day he decides to become a gymnast and breaks his leg tumbling off the manger and asks Jesus to heal him. Jesus, though only a day old, lays his hands on Hank and somehow manages to break his other leg.

“Whoops!” Jesus squeals and then winks at his parents.

Hank grows up to be an architect and never spends the holidays with his brother. --TK